Required time to read: 5 minute
Let me tell you a story that has been repeated many times! Some time ago, a group of students visited one of our science parks. Apparently, before entering the park, the teachers lost control of their students, and they tried to guide and control the students with a harsh and insulting tone. When they entered the science park, we led the supervisors into the guide room and asked them to let our tour leaders lead the students. Moments later, when our tour leaders controlled students, one of these surprised teachers came forward and asked us to explain to him how we did it?!! Attract and control disobedient students without yelling or threatening?!
Sometimes in counselling sessions, teachers ask us, “How can we keep a cool head when some students deliberately refuse to do various things, lie, and show aggression and stubbornness?”
We know that it is challenging to stay calm in front of them. Many trainers and teachers try different solutions, but they do not work. Our first recommendation for a successful solution is to consider the importance of pathology and then take appropriate action.
Causes of disobedience and its solutions
Attracting attention
Some students try to get attention by making their classmates laugh. If these people do not get enough attention for some reason, these kinds of behaviours can fill that void. A positive relationship between teacher and student is very important. When students feel cared for despite any problems and are no longer fragile in the classroom community, they no longer feel the need to attract attention to themselves through unconventional methods.
Disappointment
Some disobedient students may be frustrated with their studies because of family problems or other reasons. For these people, following the rules is pointless. In these situations, emotional communication and empathy with them can lead to a correct assessment of the cause of disobedience. Therefore, the school counsellor’s role is very important and helpful here.
Behavioural disorder
Some students may have ODD or other behavioural disorders. If a person has a disease, no one will expect him to follow the rules because the actions of such a person will not be according to his will.
Labelling
Imagine a student is called or labelled a “rebel.” He takes this as a character trait and begins to behave in the same way. For example, if a student is labelled “the best,” he or she will try never to make a mistake. Neither praise nor blame should be associated with the label.
Disagreement
Constantly hearing “NO” leads to discouragement and sometimes rebellion. When they are not allowed to do something most of the time, disobedience becomes a behaviour.
Allowing students is essential, but that does not mean accepting all Disagreements. They need to learn how to express their opposition in a democratic society respectfully. It is very effective if they think they can speak out about unjust laws.
Unclear boundaries
You may set limits for your students but do not explain their purpose. It is easy to refuse when there is no logical reason for the law. Bringing a reason to understand a subject is very helpful. For example, if they are forbidden to do something, knowing the consequences gives them a logical reason.
- A timely reward can create positive behaviour. If a student is rewarded for doing the right thing or avoiding the wrong thing, his brain will continue to strive for that reward.
One of the things we pay attention to in dealing with students is the “power of respect.” The big problem is that educators sometimes look down on students and think that only students should be respected. Respect is the most important foundation of self-esteem. A person who does not think he or she is worthy and respected is likely to do any unproportionate behaviour. Blaming, yelling at, and worst of all, cursing destroy mutual respect and friendly relationships with students.